In the market, workplace, and life, many people often have mental exhaustion. The root cause of mental exhaustion is actually dissatisfaction, lack of accurate understanding and clear understanding of the objective world, which leads to unrealistic expectations, and resentment towards others or other things that do not meet their subjective wishes, and the heart is slow to reconcile with reality.
For example, you are a leek and bought a coin. In the bull market, BTC has risen to more than 100,000 dollars, but the coin in your hand has not only not risen, but has fallen into floating losses. Cut the meat, this has been a round, and I am afraid that it will take off again after cutting the meat, and I will break my thigh; if I don’t cut the meat, I will watch it lose more and more. If I continue like this, I am afraid that I will waste my time in vain, and I don’t know when it will end. So I fell into anxiety and internal consumption day after day.
For example, you are a white-collar worker who has worked in a small company for five or six years. The company has not made much progress. Your position and salary have also stagnated. Even in the past two years, the economic situation has been bad and the company has been shrinking. You are also worried that you will be laid off one day, or the company will simply go bankrupt. You envy your classmates in large companies who get promoted and salary increases every year, and there are also generous year-end bonuses and stock rewards at the end of the year, but it is difficult to transfer to a large company. So every day you go to work numbly like a zombie, ringing the clock while being confused and internally exhausted.
For example, if you are a mother, you have arranged everything for your child since he was a child, and cultivated him into a very obedient, never rebellious, and indecisive "mama's boy" character. After your son grew up and got married, he was also very obedient, submissive, and indecisive in front of his wife, and he completely obeyed his wife's orders. You are lost, from being lost to holding your breath, holding your breath to internal injuries, but there is nothing you can do, you can only be depressed and internally exhausted.
The above three examples represent three typical symptoms of mental exhaustion. To cure mental exhaustion, there are three medicines to treat it:
1. Either don't do it or admit it.
2. If you can't do it, don't expect things to happen or have results.
3. Don't have double standards.
1. Either don't do it or admit it.
"Accept" means accepting any result from the bottom of your heart. "Accept" means being willing and having no regrets.
Anything. If you do it, you must admit it. If you can't admit it, don't do it.
For a coin, either don't buy it, or if you buy it, then you have to admit it no matter whether it goes up or down, whether you make a profit or a loss. Don't just think about winning, think about losing. If you lose, can you admit defeat?
For a thing, either don't agree to it, or if you agree to it, then no matter whether it is easy or difficult to do, whether there is a reward or not, you must not only do it, but also admit it. That is to say, although the hard work of doing things is far beyond the imagination when you agreed to it, you did not get the expected reward after doing it, and you may not even get a thank you, can you do it without any resentment?
For a person, either don't be together, or be together, then no matter what the other person's advantages and disadvantages are, you must love each other well, get along well, and live together for a lifetime. Don't refuse to accept it, and don't regret it.
The best time to say "no" is always before starting. Start carefully.
Once you start, you are on a road that you cannot turn back. If you win, be grateful for your luck; if you lose, accept failure. In any case, the past is the result of the initial choice and is a foregone conclusion; the future has not yet begun, and the key to choice is still in your hands at this moment.
Accepting reality is to reconcile with yourself. It is to deeply realize that the ending is determined by your initial adventure.
If life is a gamble, then you must first learn to be willing to lose.
The stubbornness of not admitting defeat will not let you win.
Wisely refusing to embark on the road to loss before starting will increase your chances of choosing the road to winning.
If you are halfway through, then first rationally admit the past, recognize the reality, and get out of mental exhaustion, so that you can better stand in the present and grasp the road to the future.
Recognition is not the recognition of resignation, but the recognition of the past and the recognition of reality.
Adhering to this principle will force us to adopt the way of thinking "starting from the end" in everything, and "saying ugly things to ourselves first". Before starting, don't just think about good things and beautiful things, but fully consider whether you can bear it if you must admit defeat once you fail.
Before buying a coin, you should consider what is the maximum loss you can accept in your heart if you lose money or even return to zero? If the maximum loss you can bear in your heart (after fully evaluating your economic conditions) is 100,000 yuan, then no matter how optimistic you are about this coin, you must never invest more than 100,000 yuan in principal.
A friend asks you to borrow 100,000 yuan. Before agreeing, consider whether you can accept this loss if the other party does not pay back the money? If not, then don't lend it.
Before you give to your family or to the people you love (such as your partner or children), ask yourself, if your giving does not bring you the results you want, can you not get angry, complain that your lover "does not understand" or "does not give equally", or use moral sticks such as "the grace of raising" to suppress your children? If you cannot truly give without asking for anything in return or gratitude, then be cautious in entering into marriage or having children from the beginning.
Before you hand over an important job to someone else, you should think clearly about whether you can bear the possible consequences if the other party messes up. If you cannot admit it or accept the consequences, then make a plan in advance to ensure that it is detailed.
If you do something without thinking about the consequences, and there is no result or reward after doing it, you cannot accept it in your heart, so you fall into endless mental exhaustion.
Second, if you cannot do it yourself, don't expect things to happen or have results.
For the past, we must admit it. Regret and blame others will only have a counterproductive effect.
For the future, we must do it. Expecting too much but not being able to do it and daydreaming will only make our hopes fall into vain.
To do is to take practical actions. This includes doing it yourself, leading others, exerting mobilization and organizational abilities, and working together to get things done. No matter which one, you need to take action yourself and complete it with great effort.
Lying in bed and dreaming about the spring and autumn, good things will not happen automatically.
For things that you don’t know how to do, or are unwilling to take action, or that you can’t do at all due to your ability and energy, then don’t have any unrealistic expectations and illusory hopes for the results of things from the bottom of your heart.
In investment, if you don't have the capital and ability to make 100 million, don't expect to make 100 million. If you don't have the ability to work hard outside the market to get cash flow, and don't have the endurance to cross the cycle, don't expect to be able to get ashore by hoarding big cakes. If you don't have a first-level network to get a quota, and don't have the ability to get free chips on the platform, don't expect to get rich with the copycat project. If you don't have excellent insider information speed and reaction ability, and don't have a huge fan base that responds to everyone, don't envy KOLs who make a lot of money by calling meme coins.
At work, don't just put forward ideas, opinions, and suggestions. No matter how good your ideas are or how beautiful your words are, they are just empty talk. Whether you are a boss or an employee, as long as you can't do what you say, then the ideas you put forward will definitely not be realized. Since it won't be realized, then the ideas you put forward from the beginning are meaningless. Talking about ideas in vain and not being able to implement them is not work, it's performance work.
In life, if you don't want to do something or you can't do it yourself, don't expect anyone to do it. For example, if you are very tired after get off work today and don't want to clean the house, but you expect your partner to clean the house after get off work, then you may encounter a situation where the other party doesn't want to clean the house either, so conflicts arise. If you don't want to clean or can't clean, then it's best not to expect the house to be cleaned today. Why not let it go? What's wrong with not cleaning for one day? Clean it another day when you both have a good rest and are in a good mood!
Some people who invest always complain that the market is too fucked up, the sickle is too cruel, the platform is too black, and KOLs are all scams. This is why they not only didn't make 100 million, but also lost all their principal. In fact, you have no principal, no knowledge, no ability, no investment, and no speculation. It's best not to expect blindly rushing and getting rich overnight to fall on your head.
Some people are bosses who scold their employees as idiots all day long, criticizing them for not being able to make 100 million yuan for themselves. In fact, you yourself are not capable of making 100 million yuan, so why do you expect employees hired with a monthly salary of 3,000 yuan to help you make it?
Some people cannot get into Peking University or Tsinghua University, but they are irritable when tutoring their children, blindly expecting their children to excel in their studies and get into Peking University or Tsinghua University. Imagine that you yourself cannot pass the college entrance examination, so why do you think that your children who have inherited your genes must do well in the exam?
Pain and internal friction come from wrong expectations of goals.
Life should not be goal-oriented. Otherwise, you will either be anxious or not be interested in doing things at all. Because the goal is too high, or because you can't see clearly whether it is possible to achieve it in the future.
Life should be process-oriented and interest-oriented to gain happiness.
On this issue, modern management science "does a lot of harm". There is an important theory in management science called "managed by objectives". Simply put, it is to use tools such as KPI and OKR to turn the expectations of the boss or the upper-level manager into the goals of the next-level executors. Then promote the achievement of the goal by combining the reward and punishment incentive system.
If the goal is unattainable, then after hard work, you will only taste the pain of failure; if the goal is achievable, then you can do it with or without a goal.
Real success is like the number 100...0. Efforts only add 0 to the back, and what really determines the final result is a large number or zero is the first 1, and this 1 is often not determined by you.
It's like investing in BTC. All you can do is buy, hold and wait. As for profit and loss, whether you will get rich or go back to zero, it depends on the future price of BTC, but you can hardly decide the future price of BTC. You can only accept it, not expect it.
Setting a goal for your investment is like expecting BTC to rise to $1 million next year, which is a meaningless hope. If it can reach it, it can reach it whether you expect it or not; if it can't reach it, it can't reach it whether you expect it or not.
Work hard on the cause and let fate take its course on the result.
The goal can be an action, such as insisting on writing an article every day, such as insisting on investing in BTC once a week, etc. The goal cannot be a result, such as having 1 million fans in 3 years, such as making 100 million in 5 years, etc.
Don't have expectations, don't set goals, just like when Satoshi Nakamoto invented BTC, he didn't set a date for BTC to reach 100,000 US dollars, 1 million US dollars, and so on. He set BTC to issue a block every 10 minutes, and issue a BTC. The rest is up to time.
You don't have the will to do it, or you can't do it at all with your own ability, but you still expect things to achieve the target results as you hope, so of course you will be disappointed and fall into mental exhaustion.
Third, don't have double standard expectations.
Finally, there is another type of mental exhaustion, which is to set double standards in expectations.
Thinking that the big cake is too expensive, buy a small-cap air coin, but expect it to rise steadily like the big cake.
Tell your secrets to your gossipy girlfriend in the office, but think that she will keep the secret for you.
Find a caring and warm man, but hope that he will only be warm to you and cold to others.
Such as this is essentially expecting double standards to happen, and it is the good and beautiful side of yourself. Isn't it just wishful thinking, only thinking about good things?
Any characteristics of anyone or anything are both advantages and disadvantages. Advantages and disadvantages are two sides of the same coin and cannot be separated. If you want to get his advantages, you must also get his disadvantages. If you don't want to accept his shortcomings, you will definitely not be able to enjoy his advantages.
A strict leader may be a leader who is good at sharing benefits. A relaxed and permissive leader may also be a leader with no benefits to share.
A diligent and motivated partner may also be a partner who has no time to take care of the family. A partner who is obedient and has no opinion may also be a partner who is easily brainwashed and controlled by others.
A dog coin that has skyrocketed, attracted countless attention, and has been called by big names may also be the dog coin that has been killed and harvested the most fiercely. A cottage coin project with a large number of big-name investment institutions and a luxurious lineup of project parties may also be a cottage coin project with high insider chips and heavy selling pressure.
If you only see the side of things that are beneficial to you or that you like, but ignore the side that is not beneficial to you or that you hate, and even expect things or people to only play the advantages of one trait and not play the disadvantages of the same trait, then you will often be disappointed and resentful of reality, thus falling into long-term mental consumption.
In short, think about the consequences before doing something, and once you do it, don't be obsessed with the results. Accept the results as they are. Don't just talk, take effective actions, don't set unrealistic goals, don't just want the good side and not the bad side, be prepared to accept the two sides of people and things. In short, accepting reality, not complaining, less daydreaming, more practical work, is the best medicine to cure mental exhaustion.
Anais
Weatherly